Trauma-Informed GP Support for Mothers: Healing Yourself to Raise Emotionally Secure Children
Motherhood is often described as joyful — and it can be. But for many women, it is also deeply exhausting, emotionally exposing, and at times overwhelming. As a GP abd therapist working with mothers, I regularly meet women who are doing their absolute best, yet feel stuck in cycles of reacting, shouting, feeling guilty, and trying to make up for it.
If this sounds familiar, I want to say this first:
None of us are perfect. Parenting was never meant to be perfect.
What most parents want isn’t perfection — it’s stability. We don’t want to swing between emotional outbursts and guilt-fuelled overcompensation. We want to parent from a place of grounding, calm, and connection, so our children can feel safe and secure around us.
That begins with understanding ourselves.
Trauma, Stress, and the Nervous System in Mothers
Many people dislike the word trauma. It can feel dramatic or blaming. Clinically, trauma simply refers to experiences that overwhelmed us at the time and were never fully processed. These experiences don’t disappear — they live on in the body and nervous system.
As a GP, I often see trauma expressed not only as anxiety or low mood, but as IBS, migraines, chronic pain, fatigue, poor sleep, and emotional reactivity.
This is supported by research such as the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) study, which demonstrated how early stress increases the risk of both physical and mental health conditions later in life.
Motherhood can bring these patterns to the surface — not because you are failing, but because your nervous system is under sustained demand.
Why Our Children Can Trigger Us So Deeply
One of the most painful realisations for parents is noticing that their children can trigger them.
A tantrum, defiance, or emotional withdrawal may evoke a reaction that feels bigger than the moment itself. Often, this is because our children unconsciously remind us of ourselves as children, or of unmet needs from our own upbringing.
Children don’t create our wounds — they activate them.
When this happens, parents may oscillate between anger and guilt, distance and over-involvement. This emotional unpredictability is exhausting for parents and confusing for children.
What children need most is not perfect emotional control — but predictability, repair, and emotional safety.
The Importance of a Stable, Emotionally Safe Home
We cannot focus on children alone without looking at the environment they grow up in.
Children thrive in homes that feel emotionally safe, consistent, and nurturing. Research shows that chronic conflict, unresolved tension, or emotional unpredictability within the home increases stress responses in children — affecting behaviour, learning, and even physical health.
This is why parental wellbeing and relational health matter so deeply. Fathers and partners play a crucial role in reducing household stress and supporting maternal mental health. Parenting was never meant to be a solo effort.
Mindfulness and Parenting From the Inside Out
Mindfulness is not about being calm all the time. It is about noticing what is happening inside you without immediately reacting.
Simple practices — pausing before responding, noticing your breath, grounding through your body — help regulate the nervous system. This creates space between a child’s behaviour and your response.
When parents practice mindfulness, children benefit. They experience:
More emotional consistency
Fewer explosive reactions
Greater connection and presence
Over time, this models emotional regulation for children in a way no lecture ever could.
Healing Is Growth, Not Erasure
Wounds don’t disappear. We grow around them.
Healing means becoming aware of old patterns, understanding your triggers, and learning to respond with compassion — both to yourself and your child. It is about becoming less reactive and more reflective, not flawless.
Often, parents worry that they are “damaging” their children. The truth is: repair matters more than rupture. Children learn resilience by watching parents notice mistakes, take responsibility, and reconnect.
Lifestyle, Body, and Emotional Regulation
Mental health is not only psychological — it is biological and relational.
Sleep deprivation, chronic inflammation, poor diet, and lack of movement all increase emotional reactivity and intrusive thoughts. Emerging research suggests that inflammatory diets and poor sleep can worsen anxiety and mood symptoms.
Supporting your nervous system may include:
Prioritising sleep
Gentle, regular exercise
Mindful eating
Journalling and reflection
Gratitude practices
Supportive community and other mothers
These are not luxuries. They are foundations.
You Are Not Broken — You Are Human
If I were speaking to a good friend, I would say this:
You are not failing. You are tired. You are carrying more than one person was ever meant to carry alone.
Seeking support — whether medical, therapeutic, or relational — is not weakness. It is responsibility.
Working With Me
I work as a trauma-informed GP and therapist, supporting mothers and parents to understand their symptoms, regulate their nervous systems, heal past experiences, and parent from a place of grounding rather than reactivity.
If you feel stuck in emotional cycles…
If your body is carrying stress you can’t think your way out of…
If you want to bring more calm, stability, and connection into your home…
Support is available.
📍 Appointments and enquiries via drayieshamalik.com
🕊️ Individual consultations, trauma-informed therapy, and mindful parenting support.
You don’t need to be perfect.
You just need enough calm to offer your child a safe place to land.